My beloved grandma passed away last month. She left us on 20th of February.
She was hospitalized for almost 3 months. I was in manila when mom called me and said that Grandma is going to be transfer to the bukit ward.Which means, patience with less risk will be sent there. But the truth is that, my grandma suffered heart attack and 24hrs monitoring by doctors is crucial. The doctors think they are REALLY smart and discharge her from the general woman's ward and sign her off that she can cope with suction and minimal oxygen support. But it was hard for her there.the tube in her throat was stuck and suction was not done by nurse regularly and it get worse when her flame was clogging the tube. since the caretaker is limited only for some duties, plus the ward is lack of staff! imagine 20++ patience and only 4 nurses are working.
At the day of CNY, she managed to sit up and weirdly enough, that morning she asked the caretaker to get her some kopi-O from the canteen. Before this she never requested to buy drinks from outside. I went there and see her. Wishing her to get well soon and i promise her that i will bring her back to stay with me.She gave out angpows for those who came and visit her. And insisted Mom & aunt to give angpows to the nurses and doctors. (She was a generous lady. While she was in CCU, all the nurses were well fed. She make sure we bring food for the nurse!) Me and my aunt left the hospital around 11am and when we arrived home, mom call up and say grandma's condition went critical. No..no..
I sped all along the way from home and when i walk into the ward, she was lying lifeless, the nurse was besides her performing CPR, trying to save her. i shock my head, tears covered my cheeks. i couldnt take it.
after an hour, doctor anna came forward and had a long explanation to me and aunt. the cpr that was perform took longer than it supposed to be. with that, a normal cpr for 4minutes can actually do harm for the patience. whereby there will be no sufficient oxygen pass through to the brain. it will caused future damage like brain damage, epilepsy or a patience will be coma for a time period depending the situation.
Grandma was transferred to acute ward but there was no bed and she was put back at the general ward. she never woke up. and after the 6th day, she went to be with God. through that time, i prayed if she would woke up and hold my hands, touch my face and smile at me. she did that often when she was still okay. she would pat my head every time i sleep next to her. she would ask how am i or the most often will be have i eaten or not.
i regret. i regret i never tell her how much would need her to be my side when i get married. i told her that i want her keep strong till when i graduate, when i got my first job and when i married and when i move in to a new house she would come along. i promise her she would stay and i will accompany her when she be discharge from the hospital. but now, there is nothing but only spoken words that will fade in memory.
till the last day, when the doctor did another cpr to gain back her heart beat, i was there the whole night by her side. i went home to get some rest and, when she passed away at that morning 10.55am, chester my cousin, was there standing next to her. i was on the way with mom and dad is trying to get a ticket in KL to come back. i cry. i say to myself, i cannot cry for grandma says people who cry is 'soi'.
my cousin was standing next to her, i touch her hand, i said to her, 'grandma, if its better for you to leave and suffer no more, than go ahead. i love u so' at one point i couldnt cry and my heart start sinking.
the preparation for the mortuary was done after all my uncles and aunts came to see her lifeless body laying on the hospital bed. the service was done by Fook lu siew. i offered myself and together with the 2 caretaker we bath my late grandma.
3day service at the funeral parlour. everyone came back except my cousin. my dad ask my aunt if my cousin, Kah Nen would come back to pay his last respect but then my aunt says my cousin cannot make it because he cannot ask for emergency leave. he is not even in the professional field, and i am not discriminating him but for the last time, why he couldnt make it and my dad, an outsider is willing to pay for my cousin's ticket.
below, some pictorial with my grandma
:( ..: last two years.....
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