Monday, September 28, 2009

My mind says so ...

Today's Programme : Went for movie with Acyl (my dearie syg goodie pal) and of course Mr.Bonn of mine!



Watch the 'GAMER' ..interesting movie tho but very cliche and easily 'expected' kind of movie conclusion. We did enjoy but i guess both my partners for the day (Acyl & Bonn) would actually go for Perfect Getaway if there is an early show during that time. LOL..it is triple scarier that Final Destination. (P.S : i have fobia with scary,thriller and more than two horror genres movies)..

I am still feeling the raya mode holiday inside my head

Even my lecturer is still 'confuse' a little .(I dint attend her class) So according to my friends, she gave a 45minutes talk and left the class. Okay,so nw even lecturer's will demand for extra holidays maybe =)


So, lets talk bout something else.. oh yes, i wana post a quote by this junior mate of mine. Who respond to my ex-teacher's statement

''Can we seperate sex with love??? And what is making love then???....Anak-anak murid ku nda payah jawab....ni soalan 18SX....hehe...Bekas anak murid boleh...hihihi''


Few commented with very excellent answer and few did barely pointed out some bias facts. But after all the debate issue there comes another long comment, actually 3 comment stated by this boy name Elijah Hugo (my junior during Bahang high school) who earlier i dint even wanted to read about, but i dont know why i read his comment. He says;


''Of course we can separate love and sex! Haha! Love means forgetting oneself for the good of others. When u help someone, or when u do something to another person in the best of intention and with no regard for your own self and expecting none in return, than that is love. U show love to your partner when u give them respect, understanding and ... protection, and do nothing to harm them. Now and even for the future. U do nothing that will harm their reputation, name, honor and self respect even if the relationship wont last. For me, that is love in the context of having a partner because love can be express in many different way.But, i will also say this. In the end love to your partner will also lead to sex. Because that is how u show your partner how u truly feel for them. How u love em. Sex is a sacred bonding of 2 people, it is literally a fusion of two to one. In my opinion, u may only make love when u are prepared to take the responsibility to protect, cherish and love your partner.


Make no mistake! To truly make love, you must be IN LOVE! Dont jump into sex the moment there is an invitation. They say that sex is a natural habit of animals and that it is natural to sleep around because u are merely following your instincts. If you agree with that, than do you consider yourself animals as well? We are higher beings capable of ... making decisions, ponder on questions, invent, appreciate and love.Love means sex? Come on. Love has been downgraded by everyone. They say that when u get into a relationship, in love and all, this gives u the right to have sex? This is what happen when you get people that jump into sexual practice to early and young to understand love and the feelings they feel. Love really has a higher meaning other than the physical pleasure. Is it really worth your time to Rough n Tumble and than experience the sweet pleasure that only last for a few seconds? Its not worth it. Well i do agree with some of what u've said, keep ur 1st for your true 1st.Hope some of the young ones reed this and understand what im trying to say. Oh Well, i dont think i can add anymore. Since all of u macam selesai jg bout this. Jst wanted to voiced out my opinion! Hehe! Cherio! sigh...''




He reminds me of my brother. Seriously. To speak with the facts of facts. Well, its totally true for what he says. And what shock me is that he is barely 20 years old and he could actually value Love and define sex in a more matured way. I mean you bound to meet less youngsters with this kind of mindset, or maybe i have been mixing with the wrong enviroment people? Yea, perhaps.


Well, just recently i realize how bonn really mean to me. Is not that he never meant anything but just that alll these while maybe i have been secluded and over concern about how i should keep things to myself, that i really need him in my life. I am not thinking bout the future, but just that with him i am trying to fixing myself; which is trying to be the who i am and making myself a better person.


Some may see the difference of me after being with bonn, yet i couldnt explain what people might think or feel ?. I dont give a fuck.No, No.

However, i dont know much how he loves me. Nor, may how true he felt towards me. This i am not sure. Entering the 1st year of our relationship, i learn a lot about how to put trust on men, how to love a guy and how to protect one love. I am no one perfect. I myself have been through hell lot of scandals., and yes i admit that. This teaches me a lot. To trust a guy or to invest in his lies? Karma will eat us back for what we have done. And i believe God will punish me according to what i have done in my past. In any relationship, if we dont put trust and make ourself discipline, then there should be no point of having a relationship, instead why not a lust of one night stand? And where goes our integrity?


My macha brother, thamilarasu said to me today '' thamilarasus (29-Sep-09 12:06:15 AM): sometimes yes we get lonely.. but doesn't mean we have to get just anyone to cover the loop holes '' what he say is true. I usually get psycho effect if im lonely and when i
feel have no one. Maybe i am lack of Kasih Sayang? YES.






But, as of now, i have all the freedom to breath in my lungs. I am not affiliated to anyone. :) Except to mr.bonn. And may God guide me, to have this relationship stay long enough. I may not accept the fact that he do annoys me with all his acts and egoistic, but those are the things that pathces us up somehow, indirectly? Yes!



He might not be romantic with bouquet of roses nor he do not give me frequent calls, but i am still loving him.



*Me, Bonn, Iwan & Amy*



I will. Because i love him so. Amen :)










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